it was yesterday, (';
im so happy with you, even though we just around the church, its okay, as long i am with you, im happy <3
i really miss ur hugs and thanks for your hugs yesterday dear.
im happy when you hold my hands and kiss my hand and say that you love me.
i know you never meant to hurt me, but i can see, you dont really get what i want and what i feels.
yeahh, now i really know you, but its okay. one day you'll know me better (';

now its 300511.
holiday? yeah, ka'amatan. and he's going to Semporna. i just don't know why i don't want to let you go. damn, its so hard for me and hurts me. i don't know why, like im fooling myself even though nothing wrong. stupid right? and im so weak with forcing my feelings, i can't stand it. )'; when i sad or hurt, my tears will fall. i hate it actually but yeah that is me. hm, but i let him go, i don't say "no" to him, i just say "ohh i see", means i just let him go. cause when i start to force him, i'll directly remember this quotes "if you love the person, you must set them free". yeahh that's why. i can't sleep after i awake at 3.10am after calling with him, but im not off my phone, i just let it like that, calling. he went to sleep, even though i still wanna talk with him, but hm, i just let him sleep. its okay..its okay. one day there's my time. one day..


how much it hurts, i still love him. i sacrifice a lot, because i love him. as mother Teresa said "Love until it hurts" . most important, love the way of Jesus love us <3